Hi Friends!!✌️✌️✌️😉 Children are Your happiness!!
Take Care Of Children!
I would like to share with you my little experience!
I hope You will find it interesting!!
If you are like most parents you have often said “I just want my child to be happy”. Be careful what you wish for.
The search for happiness does not bring happiness. It brings dissatisfaction. It can even bring misery. What’s a parent to do? Well in fact it turns out you can be happy and your child can be happy, but not by searching for it.
Here is a reassuring fact. The human brain is not designed to be happy all the time. It is designed to be happy only in short bursts. Put another way it is healthy for your child to be unhappy some of the time.
" Happiness refers to positive emotion. Happiness It is not even a good word to fully capture what it is that people are truly after. What people want to have is greater wellbeing and that involves having meaning and purpose in one’s life.”
When you look closely at what the ‘experts’ on happiness say, they too emphasize that happiness’ is not just about positive feelings of pleasure and joy. They say ‘true’ happiness can only be achieved by also having a sense of meaning and purpose in your life.
Mean and purpose are subjective. They ae whatever you personally determine is meaningful and purposeful for you; what you feel brings you contentment and satisfaction in your life.
What is meaning and purpose? It is not about you!
Meaning tends to refer to the questions “Why are we here? Or What’s it all about?” Meaning generally comes from a sense of connection with something bigger or outside yourself- Religion and spirituality give meaning to life. But more secular or humanistic meaning can come from affiliations with groups of people who have shared values for example, or who work toward a shared goal or enjoy like-minded pursuits. Purpose refers to ‘why you get up in the morning’ and ‘what motivates you’ or ‘what your central aims are in life’
When taking to kids use down to earth language. Kids can’t relate to such lofty concepts as meaning and purpose. But they can relate to what matters to them, what is important to them, what interests them or what they care about.
Here is a reality check. Happiness is temporary. The brain is wired, so that rewards in life give us a jolt of happiness or pleasure. There is a long list of these rewards: food, fame, sex, money, attention, recognition, praise, winning a competition, purchasing new clothes or new gadgets, receiving a present; even the experience of novelty, like changing the channel, and of course alchohol and drugs. But the brain is also designed so that the pleasure and happiness quickly fade. In order to feel them again you have to eat more food, become more famous, make more money, get more recognition, drink more, take more drugs. In other words the search for happiness is like a leaky bucket. If all you care about is being happy, then it sets up a vicious cycle of having to obtain more of these things over and over, to keep the happiness bucket filled. This ultimately leads to chronic dissatisfaction and unhappiness in life.
Meaning and purpose are long lasting. Meaning and purpose involve the ups and downs of feeling. They require perseverance in the face of hard work and difficulty. They require coping with disappointment, frustration and even at times failure. That is why it is important to differentiate ‘happiness’ (of the temporary kind) from ‘true’ happiness, which only comes from having meaning and purpose as well as happy feelings in one’s life.
It can make you unhappy if you are too afraid of being unhappy. Keep in mind that unhappiness is a normal and inevitable part of life. If you try to avoid it, you will fail. It can help your child not be so afraid of being unhappy if you teach them that no matter how intense or painful, negative emotions do not last. Negative emotions come and then then they go. When your child is frustrated, or disappointed or hurt, remind them they are normal and inevitable. Remind them that although it is painful (!) now, the feeling will naturally get better over time all on its own.
How do you impart meaning and purpose into the life of your child? You don’t. You can’t. You may have found your own ‘spark’ in life. But you can’t simply give that to your child. You can’t do a ‘meaning and purpose’ infusion into your child. They must discover it for themselves. You can only assist the process along. Your child will show you, what they want, what matters to them, what gives them a spark. Your role is to notice, to be interested in listening to them when they talk about it and to help them pursue their interests. Kids by their very nature spontaneously find things they like to do and develop opinions about what is important to them. Kids like to talk about what matters to them. However, you need to give them the space and the acceptance to express their opinions- whatever they may be. Just bein
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